While writing Part One of He’s Your Son, Not Your Man, I was overwhelmed by how many responses I received on social media sharing their stories about the Momma’s Boy Epidemic. There are so many women who have had to deal with this! I was delighted to see in the recent Steve Harvey movie, “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man”, that was based on his Best-Selling Book, talked about the epidemic. The movie featured a Momma’s Boy Character and all the inner-workings that went along with dating one. ~shivers~ It was pretty hilarious to see how much time the character dedicated to his Mom. It was like he was her best and ONLY friend, and yes in some cases seemed like he was her MAN. There definitely needed to be some balance in that relationship!
In his book, Steve says that it is the woman’s fault if their man is a Mama’s boy. He says “stop coming up with excuses and realize that he is a mama’s boy because you let him be.” He uses a letter he received as an example. The lady wrote in, because her husband had left the house after 11pm, because his mother needed help baking cakes for event the next day. Yikes! Really Mom?
Steve tells the woman that if she hasn’t set any standards or requirements for her man than he is going to follow the woman that did, which is his mother. OUCH...point taken! Of course, you cannot really compete with the mother, but as the wife, he should know by now what’s is acceptable. Also ladies, as much as we wish they were, men can’t read your minds. Communication is what it comes down to. Steve was just saying that the woman needs to make it very clear that she is respected and honored. Not second fiddle to Mommy.
Honesty, in most cases you (the girlfriend or the wife) probably knew what you were signing up for because I’m sure MOMMY DEAREST was in the picture while you were dating as well. You probably were just hoping and praying it would stop or slow down. Or that it was your imagination—this can’t REALLY be happening you said to yourself. LOL. Now you know…~drumroll please~ PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR GUT from early on!
I have been blessed to only date one TRUE Momma’s boy in my life and that ended quickly since everything would SHUT DOWN when Momma came to town or called. I mean, he turned into a little robot who couldn’t think straight or make decisions unless he asked his “Momma.” Big turn off. Me personally..I like a MAN, not a Momma’s boy! NEXT…LOL Well, I can hardly complain, since I haven’t seen anything like what these ladies have been through. Check these member’s stories out….
1:“Imagine a dinner party at home with some other couples. All friends who have traveled together, hang out a lot, we all know each other well. The topic of hurricanes comes up, and all living close to each other we discuss what would happen in the BIG ONE came headed straight for our neighborhood.
We shared get-out-of-town plans, who would contact family members, what to do with pets and what would you take with you if it would all be lost. My hubby, in his British accent chimes in…”Well, screw all that, I’m going straight home to Mummy (in England)”
Notice the wife and pets are not mentioned.
I did also find out that he was INTENTIONALLY raised not lift a finger and did not know how to do anything for himself. They didn’t want him to “work” around the house (that was a woman’s job). His mom was a stewardess and is the house servant to everyone. The 23 year old sister who lived at home would have all of her meals waiting for her on a plate in the fridge, laundry done, you name it.
It was disgusting. We are now divorced!
Running From Mummy Dearest, Miami, Florida
2. “I have a lot to say on this epidemic having been married to not ONE, but TWO Mama’s boys! Everything from making decisions together and excluding me, to their moms calling me and complaining and sharing their opinion about decisions that were made between me and their sons. Makes you want to run for the hills and become a nun!:) After awhile, I was happy to return these “boys” (both my exes were in their 40s at the time we divorced!) Can you believe that? So, Mama’s boys come in all different ages back to their other “woman”, their moms. Some of our women are ruining their sons for the single’s market, making for even slimmer pickins’ for us.
Double Trouble, Bronx, New York
Momma’s Confession! (From a mother who wanted to share HER side of the story!)
“My first son was born when I was still a teenager (late teens, but a teenager nonetheless). So, I have spent my entire adult life as a mother. I have three sons in total and they are all the loves of my life. The love I have for them is like no other love I have ever felt and I doubt anything will top it.
They were each my greatest obsession from the first second we met and I am still obsessed with them. They are their Mama’s Boys, which makes my heart swell up with pride. And, in my mind, they love it! While I can’t tell you the inner workings of every mama’s boy, I will share with you how my three mama’s boys came to be.