“You are not a victim. No matter what you have been through, you’re still here. You may have been challenged, hurt, betrayed, beaten, and discouraged, but nothing has defeated you. You are still here! You have been delayed but not denied. You are not a victim, you are a victor. You have a history of victory.”
― Steve Maraboli
Today, I got a call from someone who wanted an appointment for coaching. He started to share what he was going through, how horrible his life was, how nothing was going right. However, as I listened …I heard nothing but blame. It was his business partner’s fault for the company failing, his mother’s fault for dying and leaving him with her bills, he couldn’t trust any of his friends because they weren’t there for him when he was always there for them, his car just got repossed and they were jerks for taking it. Everyone was against him and he didn’t do anything but point the finger. He didn’t have anyone in his circle anymore because, you guessed it…he didn’t trust anyone.
I told him what I heard (the blame) and that one thing he would have to be open to if I was going to coach him, was to take responsibility for what actions he took to lead to some of the situations. As his coach, I will help him awaken to his greatness and help him develop strategies to maneuver during these tough times.
However, when we put ourselves in VICTIM MODE there is nothing anyone can do for you. Since, in our minds, our problems are caused by other people, we are expecting other people to fix things. In order for your life to change, you have to come from a place of power and start to realize there are some things you can do to shift your life’s outcomes.
Mental Health Survival Guide says the following about Victims:
“By blaming others we transfer power to “them”, and paralyze ourselves while we wait for “them” to change or release their hold on us. By remaining locked into our victimized explanations, we become helpless to change a situation or attitude, while we pour our energy into complaining and anger, and other misdirected activities that can’t resolve our issues. Helpless thoughts lead to feelings of depression, anxiety, and chronic anger.”
So when you find yourself in a low point of your life, get clear on how you got there. Be really honest with yourself! If you are ready to step into your personal power, join me in my coaching group and start to get clear on just how strong you really are. We’ll be waiting for you in the CIRCLE OF POWER!
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